A Wishlist of Things I Want But Cannot Have

... at this moment in time.

Today is Monday. There is no better way to describe the utter despair that oozes from my pores every week when Monday rolls around - how my undereye-bags seem to sag into black obscurity, how my brain refuses to function - than to say that Monday, universally, sucks.

To beat this week's case of the Mondaze, I'm online window shopping. The concept is entirely contradictory of itself because online shopping allows one to trick her credit card company into thinking she's suffering from identity theft when in all actuality, she's had too many glasses of pinot noir and has run out of Orange Is The New Black episodes to watch, so she's cruising Net-A-Porter like it's her job. I don't have a credit card, am underage, and have never seen OITNB, so obviously this isn't my story, but it easily could be someone else's. Although I really am obsessed with Net-A-Porter.

But back to the online window shopping. A little sartorial perfection truly goes a long way. Do you ever perk up by just looking at the meticulous beading on a Valentino gown? Can your grumpy mood be resolved by gazing at the plethora of textures gracing a Balmain creation? I can't be the only one... Seriously? I'm the only one?

Please relish in this Weekly Wishlist of all the things I absolutely wish I had but simply cannot afford. Remember, I'm seventeen, unemployed, and sleep two floors below my mom. Trust me: Nothing gets past her.

And if you want to make this Monday a little bit better for me, you can purchase one of these items and mail it to my address. Please and thank you... in advance.

All items available via Net-A-Porter.